DONT READ THIS!

Its awkward sometimes when you have a self dialog between you and yourself. it seemed like there are two souls that are attached to you a negative energy and a positive one. Those two soul will restlessly determine where to go in life and what kind of decision you'll take. maybe it sounds cliche but it goes that way on me for some reasons, i think that i've made the right decisions for some things in life, but i've also mistakenly did wrong and im learning from it all. I once heard a dutch friend of mine saying "the quicker i do wrong, the faster i learn and improve" and hey!! she got a point there. But then i will always take things easy and bare the consequences.

Well, the second fact i found recently is that insecureness leads no where, its something that is normal for everyone to have, i even posses this with full of awareness but for some people they look at it in different ways, trying to redeem their insecureness by covering it up with something they have as potential some do it successfully , and some still need much more effort ( i wont say "fail" because i believe a person would be able to realize how they are able to utilize their true potential) the only thing you got to do is stay true who you are and try to improve on how you treat your environment and your surrounding . I know its all theories (hey! im human) but im still observing and learning from people.

I know sometimes i have a insufficient level of ability on listing to people(im working on that). But can still be a good friend :D. I used to not be able to accept the truth but now its clear to me that i rather hear the truth and know my mistakes faster and  try to improve quicker. Im not really good at self-introspecting i guess, i guess i like it better when someone says it in front of my face, yes but of course not all people have the guts and just run away (but sometimes i still do that too for some reasons). i often find conditions where i like to be frank to my friends, i like it to be open and honest, for real people who really appreciate me as an individual it works, but for some its just a pity that they take it literal, and go away for good, making some sort of abstract distance which does not what so ever help the process of creating sincere friendship. But i do respect their decision to do so. its every humans choice to determine what they want their life to be. Maybe that abstract distance was an interpretation of fear or hatred (idk) but one thing for sure i try to love all the people surround me even though for some has given me a dark past. its hard i know, even myself had not been a good being to some, but it will be greedy to want them all, for the current time i will appreciate the time being. i will be okay with the  temporary emptiness, i still have you who ever is reading this, even as a friend an enemy or a stranger, i really appreciate for you reading this so far, i still have close friends, friends even in an awkward way, my significant others even though they are miles away, mutual friends, and a little spirit to continue this tough journey of my life.

I would love to whine about all the things Ive been facing, but that would just make me look weaker. it hurts sometimes to be aware of the fact. thats where i find sometimes one way dialog on social networking does not work, it sometimes gives you a bigger burden. the only thing ill do is to share the happiness that im being blessed for. :)

One other thing is that id just like to say to all the good friends around the world, when you have a friend who says "i need to be alone for a while" please don't leave them astray, instead hug them and come back. i will definitely do the same.

I believe in the fact that frank communication is the key to all misunderstandings, if only people would verbally express their feelings at the current time in the right time and place and to accept it, because for some people, their just not good at guessing (like me).

And to all of you hypocrite out there, thank you for making me stronger. Thank you for realizing that i shouldn't be like you. Thank you for making the mistakes that i didn't have to do in order for me to learn and improve.

You'll might be bored anyway to read this if i continue further, i will save some for the next.
Thanks for reading. :))

regards,
Nadya

Lesson from Life

Thank you for she has made me into realizing what i was not aware of before, being able to improve my self even better, learning to leave behind self centered-ness which had caused me a lot, learning to be a good listener and try to fuss less about what i could have had, appreciating of what i have that other woman in the world could not have had, making me understand that life should not merely be pressure but a time to enjoy, and realizing that I will always have myself.

descend transcend

A single soul and a meaningful love

A pair of eye with the touch, a pair of eye with the heart, two pair of hands and a little disguise

Dia  dia dia dia

Aku telah pergi, menciptakan jarak antara Aku dan dia

Love, bliss, pain, love, hurt, passion, love, happiness, hope, thought, despair, love, truth, kindness, blaze

Love, love, love

A key, a love,

Locked inside a heart

To wait, wait, wait

Dia dia dia

Satu dia telah pergi,

dia , a blaze and passion,

Touched the heart

Gone before pain

End with A promise

I look in the eye

Leave!, please stay!

Dia dia

Satu dia telah datang

dia , a rage, honest, logic

Fun, fearless, boundaries, margin

Stay!, daze, stood, leave!, go!, stay!, came

Dia

Satu dia  telah kutemukan

Dia, the impossible, cheerful, distant

In a box, a jukebox, surprise.

Stay! Leave! leave!, leave!, go! Leave!, stood

Dia  dia dia dia

Aku telah pergi, menciptakan jarak antara Aku dan dia

Love, bliss, pain, love, hurt, passion, love, happiness, hope, thought, despair, love, truth, kindness, blaze

Love, love, love

A key, a love,

Locked inside a heart

wait to see

wait to feel

wait to live

dan aku memilih Dia 

This reminds me of my childhood memories.....

tell me..., what do you see?

lets FLOAT

Finally!!! I could get my hands on this marvelous book!!!
NAi - Rotterdam

"The ooo Old Days"

I'ts been a while since Ive been writing,  actually I dont want this blog to be such a trash but i guess I could probably read this again and have a great laugh after.. hmmm

Just as an intermezzo, Im done with my project for the current semester, but I'd love not to talk about it, I wanna relax a bit and just enjoy this free time while I can. wink..;p

Just now I'm watching a really old movie about highscool lovelife and all that, it really reminds me of my past life where I preferably call myself as an "observer" rather than the victim (hhaha, I know you'd probably be wondering, but I consider myself as an underdog, the man behind the screen (sorry to borrow this phrase from ya PM!) trust me, I was'nt the hot ass blondie, neither the "gotta be the first" kinda girl, life seems too boring for me then I guess, or call it something like that hhaha) but yeaaa... those old times.. kept in my unconscious memory sigh*..

Based on the movie that I'm currently watching right now AADC or as translated as (whats wrong with love=cinta? sounds pathetic huh? but believe me, I still look back at those old time (sometimes) wishing I could go to the past-I dont know why, hahaha). But seriously i think its really inspiring (or I rather call it "influencing") movie for most junior highschool peeps at that time, I could recall suddenly all after the lauch of this movie most of my friends suddenly had a dream of taking psychology as a major after graduating highschool (I forgot the reason but if im not mistaken since the main actress was really interested in psychology or something) but hey I kinda miss something!!, should'nt the demand would be an interest towards literature studies?? anyways.. lets just skip this inner dialog thinggy..

Nicholas Saputra a.k.a Rangga in the film Ada Apa dengan Cinta, (by the way!. I just realised that we are under the same junior highschool almamater (♥,♥) haha)

Hmmm... let me see what I've got..Juniorhigh.. juniorhigh. juniorhigh..
1. The kings and the rabble
2. The plastic gang and mean girls
3. Juniors and seniors

4. Short skirts and blondies

5. Secret Admirer and monkey crush (lol)

6. Teachers and nickname

7. Cheerleaders and math geek
8. Short skirts and high socks
9. Concerts and gigs
10. . .... lets just brain storm as we go shall we..

If you know what I mean... There are just a bunch of stuff I could whine about when you think of the old days, things then are just illogical when you think of it right now (well at least for me, hehe)

By the way, Id love to do a review on the film, theres just too many things I'd like to contradict to, but I'll leave that for later.. ;) 

Heres a picture I took this afternoon while having a little walk in old Centrum and the Ijssel river with a couple of friends of mine to freshen up this page ;p, enjoy!!

These are just some of the pics and scenery youll find about the old city of Deventer.
Cheers!! ;)) 

Happy winter to spring!

Lots of ♥ from the Netherlands

"I'M IN LOVE"

Finally, I'm in the end of my project design process, These last few days went pretty well ,I survived the last feedback (T____________T)".. And OH-I-SO-NEED-A-DAY-OUT!!

During my hectic week of project deadline I managed to keep in touch with my Bee in South Korea, he Introduced me to Eliza Doolittle's song "Skinny Genes". By the way, for those of you who are not quiet familiar, Eliza is a rising song writer and singer from UK. Her song actually had come across me a couple of times but I just couldn’t be bothered looking up for it since I was "so busy with my Brennero". I was really out of Inspiration and lack of motivation at that time, Bee knew that I was kinda stressed so during our talk over the net he sent me the link of a song and it's somehow cheerful and colorful, which I need veeerry much coz I've been gloomy for the last few days.

I came across her songs and stumbled upon her other songs which I consider catchy and just sincere, I love the tune and the lyric so much that I downloaded some to my curve (which seriously I don’t do often). Any of you reading this post I suggest you to check out "Moneybox", it somehow got stuck in my head, its just so original I guess, I luuurve it!!

And yeaa.. Apart from her songs, which had made me survived through my final feedback *CREDITS TO BEE!! ♥J*, I was inspired by her looks, her trademark were high waist mini shorts and skirts (mostly shorts) and a pair of Nike Air Royalty Macaroon (IHEARTTHEMSOMUCH)(♥_♥)wantthemredwantthemredwantthemred!!.

Happy winter to spring!

Lots of ♥ from the Netherlands