"there I go skipping a minute..."
Arisbon just IM'd me to tell that he's running out of bat so I had to skip a minute of this writing to quick reply him. Anyway if anyone is reading this and might be wondering who Arisbon is, I promise to you ill write about this special guy. But lets focus today's writing on self contemplation and evaluation.
Ok.. where were I..
Ok, yes writing from the heart. Hmm...,lately I've been thinking about concepts. Concepts of life, how one perceive to see and lo live it. I admit solemnly that I'm a chicken when it comes to interpreting feelings into words. It happens a lot. I'm quiet sure that its because I'm more of a practical person. Its easier to interpret feelings by actions I guess, words are just too two dimensional. (and i also believe that its the cause of all the misunderstandings I made)
As we get older we face much complicated problems that we had to handle. Myself for an instance thought that I had faced a a lot, and each year for me is a different experience with its own level of difficulties and complications. and each year just doesn't get easier.
As we get older, we tend to think that there are a lot of things that are unnecessary. These kind of thoughts are a pat of our long learning life process.
By now, I had gone through more than a year in my professional working experience as an assistant urban designer (not forgetting to mention also as a partially hired researcher and my part time volunteering as a tourism ambassador). As an assistant I've learned so much, just like how I have had since years ago. I got to realize also that my way of thinking is gradually changing. I had to think about long term priorities which I was not used to before. The way i used to do things was more of "do what you like" but not all these experience and self -maturing attitude made my self for thinking "do what you think is right".
See, the way I perceive these two different phrase is :
"do what you like" seems more inconsiderate, prompt, and random. more subjective and feels more egocentric.
whereas,
"do what you think is right" feels more thoughtful *well at least there is a bit of a thinking process involved* and the term "right" which probably will also get our self for thinking comparisons between whats right or wrong, and whats good or bad.
I guess this is how i changed overtime, I was eventually forced to think this way because of the external force that made me had to decide upon my own choices and solve my own problems. Being an adult turns out to be not so easy, *not that I'm saying that i cant live up to it* there are much more risk and sacrifices that we have to make in order to feel secure. But I guess that there are not only one just like me? (right??.....anyone????.... no???.. hmmm ok, ill have to requestion on that again, hehe)
Sooooo the point is..., Lets face this phase of a challenging life to go further on the next!!.
There is a wonderful future waiting ahead for us to enjoy and explore. :)
Love from Depok City!
Cheers!
N
- ♥-


